DAY 13: What is love?...baby don't hurt me..

I can only speak from my own experience, I can comment on what I have seen, the books I have read, the people I have met, and the things that I have perceived. I do not claim to be an authority on any of the subjects I tackle because I have not seen, read, met or perceived everything.  When it comes to today’s subject all of us are experts and all of us are fools...we have experienced its glory, we have experienced its bite, it can cast a dark shadow, it can turn the dark to light. (I couldn’t resist the temptation of working in a little rhyme.)

Today I want to discuss, analyse, wonder and rhyme about the biggest subject of them all, you have probably figured it out by now...I want to talk about Love...mostly about women and their relationship with love.  Do women love too much? Do they have unrealistic expectations of the subject?

It seems that most women are only saddened by love. I have seen so many tears and behind those tears there was always a boy, and ask me if said boy had tears in his eyes...the answer is no, no he didn’t. Maybe he hid it away, maybe he felt so much he just didn’t know how to express it, this could indeed be true, but honestly it just seems like the boy was confused as to why the girl was crying in the first place. It seems like men and women miss each other, they communicate around each other, and more often than not end up on the fringes of understanding. Then one adapts, often the women, leaving a part of herself behind, and even if she doesn’t realise it she has already started to mourn the part she lost. Compromising is overrated. You should never have to compromise who you are for anyone or anything. If you feel you are losing who you are it means you are not in the right place, write it off to experience and save yourself.

There is one thread that connects all the feminine tears, only one, it is so simple that it is hard to understand why men haven’t figured it out yet, if only they could apply this the women in their lives would be less inclined to cry...A woman simply wants to be adored. Every woman, it doesn’t matter in which shape or size she comes in, has the seed of magic inside her. If this seed is nurtured with the delicate touch of appreciation, if it is watered by loving words of affirmation, if it is validated, if it is celebrated, and if it is respected  that magic will reveal itself to the world in a glorious display of femininity, and love will find its form in the world. By adoring a woman, you will understand what it is to be adored. If you validate her, all of her, even the parts you don’t like, you will help her become the queen she carries inside, and in turn you will become King. It takes a real man to love wholeheartedly, it takes a real man to speak tenderly, it takes a real man to celebrate his woman, and in the presence of a real man, a woman will shine and he will soar.  A woman can be a blessing or a curse; it all depends on how you treat her.

Now to answer my own questions; do women love too much? I don’t think it is possible to love too much, but because we so willingly surrender ourselves to love or what we confuse for love, we get hurt. Love itself can only heal, what hurts us, is not love but loves shadows; obsession, infatuation, rejection, co-dependency and wanting to be saved. To be loved, you must know what it means to love, and you must love yourself, no-one will complete you, no-one will save you...that is your job.

Do women have unrealistic expectations of love? Again the answer is no. Love is large, it can handle, and over perform on anything that is expected of it, but people are fickle and weak and we sometimes expect too much of people.  Wanting to feel like you belong somewhere,  wanting to be appreciated and adored is not unrealistic, it is beautiful.

Girls be the kind of woman that deserves to be adored, and I urge all the real men out there, to always speak with kindness, to try and be patient and to adore their women. The world is in desperate need of more kings and queens.